Sunday, October 6, 2013
Today was better than yesterday. I keep putting my train of focus on either Ava, or other positive things going on right now. The hard part about reality is there no escaping it. I honestly wish sometimes there was... On the positive side of things, The Denver Broncos managed to pull a fifth win this season! Romo managed to buckle under pressure (like always.) This made Justin's entire Sunday!

With the government shutdown I'm not sure where we stand with getting this whole compassion reassignment processed. I read on an Army website that schools, pcsing, and tdy's are being suspended. Great timing! I've been really anxious to get back home, but I know things will work themselves out.

This weekend, Justin made some leaps and bounds in the supportive/grief department. I remember the first time someone died while I was dating Justin. It was a boy I'd gone to school with, Dwight Clark. I was working at the Super mall in Auburn and missing signs were hung up everywhere. I never had a doubt in my mind that they'd find him. Well, they did find him, but he had died. I didn't expect that. I remember being struck with immediate sadness. I remember going around the mall tearing the signs down. Justin didn't know what to do or say and that was okay because I had the support of the community. We all grieved for Dwight's family.

This time around, dealing with the thoughts of losing my mom. I don't have that same support. I know it's weird for Justin (never personally having to deal with loss) but he's making a great effort. Letting me break down. Letting me cry, asking if I need help, taking Ava for a short time will I recoop. I know with the love of my husband, no matter how badly my heart hurts, he is someone I will always let in. I'm glad he's my best friend.

I'm hoping this week is better than last. I'm diving into my studies all week. I promised I'd do some form of cardio (more than likely yoga.) I'm carving out a pumpkin for a prop that will be used in Ava's Halloween photos AND I think we might be squeezing in a breastfeeding/lifestyle session with Victoria Simmons Photography. Hopefully that's enough to keep my mind busy.

I've been skyping my mama lately and that's helped a lot. It feels good having her see Ava and I in real time rather than just on the phone. I'm off for now, my lovey's are preparing for bed and I should probably get there too!

Happy Sunday all!

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