I think we are all guilty of this in one way or another. Technology is at an all time high, and it's so easy to be consumed in an online social media forum, Pinterest, or amazon just from your cell phone. The time we spend online can sometimes be outrageous, and I don't think we realize just how much time we are taking away from being actively present with our families. When Ava was little, I didn't really see a problem with this. Newborns sleep so much that I found myself having loads of extra time on my hands just to browse the web. Now that I have a full blown toddler, the time I had before is no longer. Ava is down to one nap a day and her other waking hours are spent playing and being completely active. Rather than trying to limit my presence with my child, I put everything else aside. Don't get me wrong, there are times when we need to make an important phone call, submit a school assignment, or maybe we just couldn't wait to post a picture of our cute kids, but other than those occasions the phone is away.
The growth of a child is so rapid, and you'd be surprised by all that you see them do when your focus is solely on them. Justin and I have this talk regularly. Since he works long hours and gets limited time with us, we make our time together count. During the day, we don't really do a whole lot of activities for ourselves, and that is completely okay. Recently Ava started making new sounds for her emotions (more on this in her 19 months post) and we honestly wouldn't have caught it if we had been consumed with other things, like our phone. Whenever she sees something sparkly or if she seems something light up, she says, "Ohhh Wow" and it is the cutest thing ever. Whenever she eats something that she thinks is pretty tasty, she goes, "Mmmm" with the cutest smile on her sweet face. It's little things that like that remind me that being completely present is more than necessary.
Each day this past week I have found a way to use my phone a little less and less. With family out of state, we try to talk to them pretty regularly to stay up to date. Today, rather than making a phone call, we sent a letter in the mail. Ava helped and added her little signature (you're welcome grandmama). This way Ava's grandmama gets an update on how we are all doing, but she gets to keep that letter forever. Whenever we take park trips or even trips to the store, I leave my phone behind. I do bring my camera along, but other than that... it's just me and the babe. I even utilized a phone book the other day. Rather than relying on Google (like I always do), I braved a paper cut to find the number I needed. There is a reason why the childhood years from generations before us were so full and fun.
They didn't have the distractions we have today, and they had to be creative. I miss that aspect of life, so this is why I'm opting to put the phone down a bit more. I want Ava bug to remember the moments when her mommy and daddy were right there with her, not yapping on the phone while she did her first cartwheel or hand stand. Not the moments her mother spent on the computer while she asked to bake cookies or something, you know? If you would have told me a few years ago that I would be the gal that resents technology, I would have laughed.. LOUDLY. Now, I see the reasons why It can sometimes be harmful. Not just for parents, marriages, or kids.. but for all relationships. We have too many distractions in our life that we can't control, we can control our phone usage.
Just some food for thought on this beautiful Washington day!
Happy Monday all!
♥- Leilani
Put the phone DOWN
Monday, December 15, 2014
Thursday, November 6, 2014
I've been wanting to write a post like this for a long while, but I felt that it was pretty redundant, so I refrained. Today, I can not hold my lid on anymore. For those of you who are longtime "Simply Howland" readers, you know that we have cloth diapered from the day Ava bug was born (with the exception of using the biodegradable diapers during travel time, and her first 11 days of life). You know that I fully support natural parenting methods and attachment parenting methods. I hope all of my readers also know that by sharing my parenting tidbits and thoughts, that my intention is not to "shove" it down your throat, or make you feel bad for utilizing different methods that work for your family.
That being said, all is not right in mommy world. In fact, all is pretty nuts! I haven't engaged in anything in particular, but rather observed. I can't believe what I'm seeing. My heart actually hurts guys! Here we have a huge world of women that could be encouraging one another and supporting one another, but instead we decide to tear one another down. We decide to compare our children and treat parenthood like some sort of competition. Instead of utilizing one another for helpful information, we choose to put others down for their parenting choices. It really is awful, and I've had enough.
I've decided to come out and say something for all of those parents that choose to use disposables. I chose to focus in on this topic because cloth diapers are at the top of my frustration list. Here goes nothing! I hope by the time you are done reading this, you feel even more validated in your parenting decisions! As I mentioned before, We have used cloth diapers with Ava since the day she was born. I researched cloth (ALOT), I picked out each one after proper research, and I fully took on the extra dooty (haha, a little humor), that came with cloth diapers. The first six months were an absolute breeze. no rashes, the laundry upkeep was easy, and best of all? The waste was able to go right in the washer. Fast forward six-twelve months... The waste of a baby on solids is without a doubt the most gruesome sight I have ever seen. The colors.. the texture.. the colors! Oh my lanta. Cloth diapering got hard. I actually had to wash the waste off. And although my daughter is angelic and beautiful in every way, her waste is NOT.
We had to deal with blowouts, leaks, and sometimes damaged diapers. Not to mention that while you have five other loads of laundry to wash, you have to make sure that cloth is done every other day (our routine). Let's fast forward twelve-seveteen months. I have a toddler that drinks so much more, eats so much more, and a toddler that knows how to take dirty diapers out of the pail. We had to find the proper absorbency adjustment for Ava, I've had to find the proper stripping contents for the diapers, and I've learned to fix her diaper snaps. I've had to adjust to getting rid of toddler waste (even more disgusting than infant waste), and bac-out has become my best friend. All of these frustrations stem off of the fact that I wanted to cloth diaper.
With disposables, there is none of this. With disposables, you don' have to stay up late/wake up early to do the same load of laundry for over two hours. You don't have to worry about chunks of waste splashing on you as you scrap it into the toilet. You also don't have to worry about keeping your child's diapers in "good condition" because it's a one and done type of job. I myself have been dreaming about the day we no longer cloth diaper. Not because I don't love them, but because they have become a huge pain for me at times. So before you allow someone to make you feel bad about your choices OR if you are that person that likes to be a "cloth snob" remember that while others are up doing loads of smelly diaper laundry, some disposable using mama is in her warm bed.. asleep! There are pros and cons to each method, but I definitely see the ease and comfort of using a disposable diaper.
♥- Leilani
That being said, all is not right in mommy world. In fact, all is pretty nuts! I haven't engaged in anything in particular, but rather observed. I can't believe what I'm seeing. My heart actually hurts guys! Here we have a huge world of women that could be encouraging one another and supporting one another, but instead we decide to tear one another down. We decide to compare our children and treat parenthood like some sort of competition. Instead of utilizing one another for helpful information, we choose to put others down for their parenting choices. It really is awful, and I've had enough.
I've decided to come out and say something for all of those parents that choose to use disposables. I chose to focus in on this topic because cloth diapers are at the top of my frustration list. Here goes nothing! I hope by the time you are done reading this, you feel even more validated in your parenting decisions! As I mentioned before, We have used cloth diapers with Ava since the day she was born. I researched cloth (ALOT), I picked out each one after proper research, and I fully took on the extra dooty (haha, a little humor), that came with cloth diapers. The first six months were an absolute breeze. no rashes, the laundry upkeep was easy, and best of all? The waste was able to go right in the washer. Fast forward six-twelve months... The waste of a baby on solids is without a doubt the most gruesome sight I have ever seen. The colors.. the texture.. the colors! Oh my lanta. Cloth diapering got hard. I actually had to wash the waste off. And although my daughter is angelic and beautiful in every way, her waste is NOT.
We had to deal with blowouts, leaks, and sometimes damaged diapers. Not to mention that while you have five other loads of laundry to wash, you have to make sure that cloth is done every other day (our routine). Let's fast forward twelve-seveteen months. I have a toddler that drinks so much more, eats so much more, and a toddler that knows how to take dirty diapers out of the pail. We had to find the proper absorbency adjustment for Ava, I've had to find the proper stripping contents for the diapers, and I've learned to fix her diaper snaps. I've had to adjust to getting rid of toddler waste (even more disgusting than infant waste), and bac-out has become my best friend. All of these frustrations stem off of the fact that I wanted to cloth diaper.
With disposables, there is none of this. With disposables, you don' have to stay up late/wake up early to do the same load of laundry for over two hours. You don't have to worry about chunks of waste splashing on you as you scrap it into the toilet. You also don't have to worry about keeping your child's diapers in "good condition" because it's a one and done type of job. I myself have been dreaming about the day we no longer cloth diaper. Not because I don't love them, but because they have become a huge pain for me at times. So before you allow someone to make you feel bad about your choices OR if you are that person that likes to be a "cloth snob" remember that while others are up doing loads of smelly diaper laundry, some disposable using mama is in her warm bed.. asleep! There are pros and cons to each method, but I definitely see the ease and comfort of using a disposable diaper.
Happy Thursday all!
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