I recently joined this group on facebook called self portraits of motherhood and OH MY GOSH.. it is pure gold. Seriously. I haven't felt this inspired in regards to photography in a good while. I haven't been in this group more than a week or so and I am already seeing my creative juices flow. The idea is to make sure YOU, yes --> you mama <-- are in the frame with your little ones. I have probably been doing self portraits for over a year now, maybe longer? I got my tripod in October 2015 and since then I've taken a lot of documentary photos for myself along with family shots, so I am pretty comfortable with getting in the frame. This group is a community of women that share the most beautiful, emotional, and raw images of themselves in the very throws that is motherhood. I have been in complete awe. Just complete awe. I shared my first image just a couple of days ago and I got such a great response from the other ladies. I get so nervous about sharing my photos but since last night - that feeling is no more. 

Just like motherhood, photography is a process. As I continue to grow and become more confident in the type of photos I want to produce - I see changes in myself. In my comfortability. I am excited to see where this new spark takes me. So far, I have been in the frame with my girls everyday this week. I find myself setting up the tripod during play time or right before nap time. I want to look back and remember the phases we were in - toys, dolls, books, etc. I also want to remember all of the smaller details in our lives. Nursing routines, cuddles, and favorite stuffed animals. I want to remember Ava requesting "her songs" on the tablet and trying to scan pandora for disney stations. I want to remember helping Ava set up her dolls in her doll house while watching her stand on her tippy toes. All of our moments. I just want to BE THERE for them all.

I talked to Justin about getting in the frame as a family too. Nothing posed, just our regular moments together. I have a feeling a lot of photos will be from Saturday mornings. There is something about our Saturday mornings that just pave complete magic for the weekend. I'm thinking about sharing some of the images I take on the blog.. if you are interested in seeing them, shoot me an email or comment on the link below. I know this year will be a pretty active one for my readers - so definitely let me know what you'd like to see. I'm hoping it'll spark something for you guys as well. You can never have too many photos of you and your little ones.

Happy Wednesday! 


♥- Leilani

Maniacal Monday

My Morning

I woke up in a really weird place. Actually I fell asleep in a really weird place. Not location, but my thoughts and energy were way off last night. I'm not feeling any less excited about giving birth or Justin's homecoming, but I'm feeling some definite regret for the way I've behaved this deployment. Justin and I have a lot of family members that care a great deal about us. Instead of allowing them to help or be apart of my pregnancy, I kept them at a distance. Trying to prove to myself that I could do everything alone, and while I have managed to not separate at the seams, I realize how many hurt feelings there have been due to my selfishness. I want Ava to know how important family is, I'm not off to a good start. This may be the reason for my less than peppy attitude the last 14 hours. I plan on turning that around.

Ava

On a much happier note, I've got 48 hours until I will be admitted into the Army hospital for induction. I'm still at this surreal phase where no words are really doing me any justice when trying to describe how I feel. This human being, this perfectly innocent little girl, that's been growing inside of me all this time will be making an unforgettable entrance in my life. In doing so she will be filling a void in both Justin's heart and mine. Voids we were unaware existed. I've never experienced a greater blessing in my life, and I am completely honored that the lord has allowed me to carry such a precious gift. 

Recap

This past weekend, I got my car detailed, finally. Twenty dollars well spent.
I had my final set of maternity photos taken by Victoria Simmons. Once again she did a phenomenal job! I become more impressed with her, every shoot. I laid back in some refreshing water. I love the pool but I'm not excited about how dark I'm getting. My skin is so uneven ! Tan lines are NOT flattering for me. I did a final clean up of the house before Ava gets here. Thank goodness I had a friend helping me. Cleaning products like comet, really aren't good for me to be inhaling at this point. I regained my love for Italian food. In my first trimester, I avoided Italian cuisines like the plague ! So it makes me happy that I was able to eat it without the sudden urge to hurl. My husband is a hardcore Italian food lover and I'm sure his first weekend back will consist of something Italian based. I watched safe haven. It's based off of a Nicholas Sparks book. Can I just say this movie was not only entirely predictable, but very boring to watch. I'm glad I didn't pay to see it in theaters ! Not my ideal romantic love story and those are super cliche within themselves! On a really random note, I feel it's necessary to share this bit of musical goodness, considering I've played this song 217 times on my itunes. (kissed you) Goodnight by Gloriana is thee best country song I have listened to in weeks. I can't get enough of it ! I'd suggest giving your ears a delightful listen. Yes, it was a pretty divine weekend for this expectant mama.

Moving Forward

I'm hoping my day turns around. Actually, I know it will. I never allow myself to sulk all that much. I plan on having a mellow Monday. I'm getting ready to head out and have lunch with a fellow Army wife here in a little bit. Excited to see her ! Haven't seen her in over a month, I believe. I may do a little last minute shopping today as well. I'm anticipating not leaving the house for the first couple weeks after my sprout's arrival. I hope all my blog readers have themselves a fantastic day! Also, please excuse my completely anal, type a, organizational posts. This is what I do in my mind before I even start writing. Lately, I've been finding it easier to categorize all that I want to say rather than just free flow writing. I promise, this is not going to be a habit that will occur for much longer.