Happy Tuesday all! Today is a very good day for more reasons than one. First, I am officially 19 weeks pregnant with Baby bean! Secondly, the heat in Washington has decreased immensely and I couldn't be more elated about fall weather. I can finally enjoy being outdoors with Ava at any time of day and she enjoys being able to play without constantly letting me know it's hot. Over the past couple weeks my relationship with my daughter has gotten so much stronger, it's almost unbelievable. She is so in tune with her mama and my pregnancy, it's been an emotional/amazing experience to say the least. Most of my readers know that we are a very tight knit family, and "personal space" isn't something we find that we need... A few weeks ago a good friend of mine posted about being "touched out" from kiddos, pets, spouse, etc. She was in her third trimester in the dead of summer.. I am more than sure that had something to do with it. Since reading about her experience I decided to research this "touched out" notion and analyze whether or not my family or myself have ever experienced it. After a couple weeks of research and truly understanding the term, I realized that we haven't.

Since the day Ava was born, we have always held her. She has always cuddled, nuzzled, and done skin-to-skin with both Justin and I. I breastfed her just three months shy of her second birthday, so it's safe to say that touching is a norm for us. Even as a two year old, Ava will crawl into our bed when she wakes up, she cuddles her daddy or myself. When we are on the couch, she snuggles into one of us, and gives us tons of butterfly kisses. Touching is a way we show our love and express ourselves in this family. With being pregnant with baby # 2, I'm wondering if this will change? If baby #2 has a completely different personality than Ava, will she not be a "touchy baby" OR will I have another cuddle bug, and start to feel as if I'm "touched out" with my children? From what I read this is completely normal and it can occur at any point in time for people who are pregnant or people with small children.

I know a change like this would be pretty confusing for Ava, and I'm really hoping we never have to experience being "touched out" but I am being open-minded about the possibility. There are a few occasions where I know I need "mommy time" but I don't see that as being the same thing. Prenatal massages, taking a nap, getting a pedicure, those are things I do to give myself time away from my family. Justin is always more than willing to take Ava on a "daddy/daughter date" so I can do my own thing. I think that goes for everyone though. We all need some time, even if minuscule, to enjoy ourselves. Being in my second trimester has been absolute bliss for me and those around me. I'm no longer sick, and aside from shooting lower back pain, I am very pleasant to be around. I find myself wanting to be near Ava and Justin almost all day long. Ava has independent play time, which is why I'm able to do things like, blog... but other than that, I don't mind her being right next to me, always. These moments with our kids don't last as long as we'd like.

Sometimes you don't realize how quickly they are growing. How quickly those little hands that have to be on you all the time, won't be there after a while. Ava steadily exerts more independence by the day and I find myself relishing in the toddler that follows me to the bathroom, that plays peek-a-boo when I'm showering, or that lifts my shirt to kiss the baby in my belly. I love that she gives her sister raspberries, and I love when she only wants to be in my arms. I know over these next few weeks my belly is going to grow even more so in size, but that won't stop me from cuddling and loving on my first born. Even with my husband, the same applies. We are a cuddle couple, and I absolutely love being held at night. Sometimes I find myself ditching the maternity pillow just to cuddle closer. I love when Justin holds my hand, or props my feet on his legs for a massage. These moments for me remind me of how fortunate I am to have the love of two very special human beings.

Here is a link to one of the many articles I read pertaining to parents dealing with feeling touched out. For those of my readers that have personally gone through this, share your experience with me! How did you manage those types of feelings? Did they come on suddenly? Or, are you a mama with more than one little that has yet to experience this? I love being connected to my mama community on the web, so leave me a comment below, or shoot me an email! In the meantime, check out this cute photo of Ava bug being a princess AND a construction woman! She refuses to go anywhere without heels and her tool bag these days!

♥- Leilani

Goodbye Georgia

This is not a bittersweet post, this is one of the SWEETEST posts I will ever write. Each passing day brings us a day closer to starting a new chapter at a different installation. I am beaming on the inside. When I got the news that Justin had orders, I panicked. I HATE change. It took me so long to warm up to Georgia, and now I have to say goodbye to everything I know here, everything that has become familiar. Now, after almost six months of knowing about the move, I feel really good about it. The best things I could have taken away from Georgia, I already have. My daughter will always be a constant reminder that Georgia was so good to me. Without our endocrinologist, who knows If I'd have Ava or not. I am forever grateful for Georgia, because Georgia gave me Princess A. Georgia also gave me more time with my husband. If Justin had stayed at Fort Lewis he would have deployed shortly after we got married. Without Georgia, I wouldn't have been able to spend two years with Justin before he deployed. We needed that time to grow as a couple, and we did. I learned that not every army wife is a friend. Just because we endure the same battles, at times, doesn't mean we are meant to mesh. Without Georgia I would have never known what it feels like to have no family, or close friends near by. This molded me into a stronger woman. Into a more aware woman. It also gave me a larger appreciation for my family. I never knew how it felt to not have them around, now that I do, I love them more than I ever did. The most important value I can take away from Georgia, would be that Georgia forced me to learn how to stand on my own two feet. Justin and I had nothing when we started. To look at how much we have now, is unbelievable. We've built a home. We didn't run to our families when we found ourselves in a bind, we learned how to rely on one another. I found out what the true definition of independence is. For that, I will never forget Georgia. Lastly, I found true friendship and love outside of my "norm" I have met people from all different walks of life, people I wouldn't have given a second glance to back home, people that had a different upbringing than me, people that come from a different coast than me. AND I have learned to love them, appreciate them, and understand them. Those same people stood by my side for an entire deployment. While I was pregnant. They were there every step of the way. For that I will forever be indebted to Georgia. You gave me a life, I never thought I'd live. I'm glad to be leaving, but I won't ever forget you.