My best gal of nearly 15 years is saying “I do” in less than a month and I’m an emotional wreck about it. So much life has been had with this woman by my side and I cannot believe I get to watch her embark on the same journey that has afforded my life so much joy. So much fulfillment. I’ve been thinking back to the day we met, quite a bit, only because we met by chance (the same way I met Justin, actually). We lived less than a mile from one another for years and we never managed to cross paths - until the universe (along with our two younger sibs) aligned our space with one another. I’ll never forget the puzzled look Leeana had on her face when she saw me holding her baby sister’s hand. She looked so confused, as did I - I had no clue that Jose and Nicole came with an older sister.

From that day on, my life was forever changed (unbeknownst to me). But that’s the thing about childhood friendships. They grow in such an organic and innocent manner, and they grow quickly. Our time together consisted of talks about boys, school, summer strolls through suburbia, facial masks at sleepovers, belting out our favorite jams side by side, and eventually sharing those feelings you reserve for only the most trusting of people… there was nothing else like it. I grew so comfortable with her. As did my family. And for years to come, Leeana was always the one person, or her house was always the one place I could be found outside of my own.

High school came around not too long after and our adventures and memories expanded and matured... in some ways. Our first run in with the law (a police officer’s first pull over), sneaking out, and my first introduction to a congregation that promoted a love for Jesus so intense, I left weeping and immediately knew that I needed to give my heart and faith to the good lord. We would go days on end spending time with one another and those are the memories I will cherish for the rest of my life.

To this day, she is one of the few people I can be surrounded by for several days and I never tire of her company. That’s not to say we haven’t gone through the ringer with growing pains and separation. Believe me, we’ve had our girl rama drama more times than I can count. We’ve had friendship hiatuses, we’ve taken “breaks” from each other, we’ve distanced ourselves, and yet in the end - we always find our way back. It is the most beautiful friendship I have ever had, as it has withered every storm, every trial, and each phase of my adult life and it has survived.

There are three vivid memories that stand out for me the most in my adult life with this woman.

#1 The day I asked her to be the god mother of my first born child

#2 The day I told her my mom passed away

#3 The day Leeana called me and told me she was getting married

I told you, a lot of life. And here we are. Three god babies later, a Frederick Wingate, two fur babies, two cross country moves (both by me), and a Vegas wedding for a soon to be December bride.

Leeana,

If you are reading this, this little excerpt is for you. First and foremost, I love you. You have been the standing definition of a loyal, imperfectly perfect friend and you have stood by me countless times. You have showed up countless times. You are so much more than just a friend. You are family. It is an absolute honor to know that you wanted me to be there on your special day. I keep thinking about what it’ll look like. Being in your bridal room. Watching your mom help you with your wedding dress. Catching a glimpse of someone praying over you for your special day. Photographing you while you get your make up done, all dolled up and completely flawless. I imagine in those moments leading up to you heading towards the limo.. your heart will be racing as you head towards the biggest day of your life. I’ll be rooting for you. I’ll be the blubbering mess crying as you promise forever to the man you love. I’ll be there.

Being a friend to my husband

If you've ever read the "sparks fly" tab of my blog, you know that Justin and I had very little time to develop a friendship in the whopping six months of courting,marriage proposals, and moving 3,000 miles. Over the years we have developed a beautiful friendship with one another (aside from marriage), and as the friendship grows, I realize just how important it is to maintain that relationship. This past summer I experienced some very strong growing pains between my husband and I. I don't think I shared too much with my readers, but it was the first time that I actually questioned wether or not I was seeing eye to eye with the man I married. It was scary, it was real, and it was my life this past July. Justin developed a brief hobby with a motorcycle, and I did not support it in any way. Here I had a man that was over the moon and excited about something new, and his wife didn't reciprocate the emotions.

I know it hurt him. It hurt me that I couldn't be happy about something that clearly gave my husband joy. Looking back at that time made me realize that what my husband really needed (aside from the list of why motorcycles were a "no no" and the constant nagging), was a friend. He needed me to gush about how exciting it was for him to be doing something for JUSTIN. He needed me to realize that although motorcycles are dangerous, so is going to a third world country for WAR. He wanted me to ask to be apart of his new hobby, so we could share parts of it together. He needed the friend in his wife to emerge, and she didn't.

Once we hashed out the growing pains, expressed how we felt, and got back to our love.. I realized that more than ever, our friendship needed to be made just as important of a priority in our lives, for always! These days, I make it a point to be a good friend to the man I love so dearly. Even with his busy schedule, we talk ALL day long. This isn't something new, but it's a lot more than just "I love you baby" or Ava bug talk. We talk about everything. Sport scores, news articles, farting (I'm not kidding).. you name it, anything under the moon.. we discuss it. We comfort each other in different ways now. Instead of the immediate overprotective husband or wife mode.. we actually evaluate the support we give. I get excited to share gossip with him, church news with him, blog posts with him. We are genuinely excited about the trivial things we do. These are all things you do in a marriage, I guess we've just sort of incorporated all that would occur in a friendship.

I also noticed the added bonus of honesty that comes with having a friendship. When you marry someone, you don't purposely put your foot in your mouth with your spouse... with your friend, you do.. and that's perfectly okay. I can't tell you how completely honest (and embarrassing) this can be at times, but it can be necessary! I guess the best part is knowing that in my heart, he's the first person I want to share everything about my life with. I get up, and I'm giddy knowing that I'll find a missed call or text from him. I'm excited that I get to see him in "X" amount of hours.. Yes, as my husband.. but also because he's my best friend. That's the point of this blog. To remind myself that a man entrusted his heart in his wife, and his friend. It's okay to respond differently, according to what his needs are.

Photo Cred: Ashley Currin Photography

How many of my readers have found it important to develop a friendship with their spouses? What are some of the things you do to allow your friendships within your relationships to grow? I'd love to hear from you below in the comments or by email.

** You can easily access my email icon on the right side of my blog**

Happy Thursday all!

♥- Leilani

Goodbye to you

Today was so bittersweet. I woke up with butterflies/nervous bugs. The feeling you get when something big is about to happen. Graduation or your wedding day, you get the picture. I really hadn't allowed myself to cry, or to think about what moving meant for me. We woke up around 8 a.m. this morning (rental company was arriving at 11) took our time getting ready, got some breakfast, and packed the last of our bags in the car. Victoria was kind enough to take me to get breakfast for Justin and I (car on the dolly), and she was super helpful with helping us clear every room to double check that nothing had been forgotten.

The time really went by so quickly. I left Justin to deal with the rental agency, and Ava bug and I decided to spend our last moments in Georgia, hanging out with Adalin and her mama. Still, things did not feel real about the move. It wasn't until the point that Justin came knocking on her door, summoning his girls to the uhaul did I realize, this is real life. We are leaving, and who knows if we are ever coming back. Wow. I started tearing up, I look over at Victoria, and she was too.

I guess you don't realize how much someone really means to you, until having them around isn't an option anymore. I had a surge of emotions going through me. Here was a woman I had spent 9 months with, praying and hoping that our husbands would return from Afghanistan in one peace. Here was a girl that watched my womb grow, and followed me into labor and delivery. A woman that cooked mac and cheese almost always for a pregnant woman who craved it. Someone who saw me at my worst, and my very best. You can't replace people like that in your life. I'm not even going to try. In Georgia, I found the true meaning of a bond. I found out what makes us Army wives special.

She walked us out to our uhual, and she didn't leave her drive way until we drove away. In those moments my heart sank. I don't think I've ever hugged her that many times in such a short time span. If I learned one thing in this world, home is definitely not your zip code, or the state you live in. Home is where you make it. I never though I'd have such great friendship, and love in Georgia.. Now here I am, bawling like a baby because I didn't want to leave all the relationships I built. I know this goodbye, isn't a goodbye forever, but that hasn't made this process any easier.

This is one aspect of military life that will never ever sit well with me. Moving. I hope Texas knows it has some pretty BIG shoes to fill!

♥- Leilani

Goodbye Georgia

This is not a bittersweet post, this is one of the SWEETEST posts I will ever write. Each passing day brings us a day closer to starting a new chapter at a different installation. I am beaming on the inside. When I got the news that Justin had orders, I panicked. I HATE change. It took me so long to warm up to Georgia, and now I have to say goodbye to everything I know here, everything that has become familiar. Now, after almost six months of knowing about the move, I feel really good about it. The best things I could have taken away from Georgia, I already have. My daughter will always be a constant reminder that Georgia was so good to me. Without our endocrinologist, who knows If I'd have Ava or not. I am forever grateful for Georgia, because Georgia gave me Princess A. Georgia also gave me more time with my husband. If Justin had stayed at Fort Lewis he would have deployed shortly after we got married. Without Georgia, I wouldn't have been able to spend two years with Justin before he deployed. We needed that time to grow as a couple, and we did. I learned that not every army wife is a friend. Just because we endure the same battles, at times, doesn't mean we are meant to mesh. Without Georgia I would have never known what it feels like to have no family, or close friends near by. This molded me into a stronger woman. Into a more aware woman. It also gave me a larger appreciation for my family. I never knew how it felt to not have them around, now that I do, I love them more than I ever did. The most important value I can take away from Georgia, would be that Georgia forced me to learn how to stand on my own two feet. Justin and I had nothing when we started. To look at how much we have now, is unbelievable. We've built a home. We didn't run to our families when we found ourselves in a bind, we learned how to rely on one another. I found out what the true definition of independence is. For that, I will never forget Georgia. Lastly, I found true friendship and love outside of my "norm" I have met people from all different walks of life, people I wouldn't have given a second glance to back home, people that had a different upbringing than me, people that come from a different coast than me. AND I have learned to love them, appreciate them, and understand them. Those same people stood by my side for an entire deployment. While I was pregnant. They were there every step of the way. For that I will forever be indebted to Georgia. You gave me a life, I never thought I'd live. I'm glad to be leaving, but I won't ever forget you.