Best Wedding Anniversary, Ever!

Wednesday, January 21, 2015
Today marks four whole years of marriage with the love of my life and I still can't believe he picked me to be his forever person. This feeling is surreal you guys, and I'm blessed to know a love like this. I knew this man for less than six whole months prior to accepting his engagement. Saying yes was one of the craziest, scariest, most emotional things I have ever done in my life, but I never looked back. Not once. Here I am today, and I have so much to show from that "yes" I gave 4.5 years ago. I have a man that is accepting, gentle, and gives me an infinite amount of love. I've seen parts of this nation I wouldn't have dare gone alone and I made some long lasting friends and memories. I opened up my heart to the first fur animal I have ever truly loved, and I became a fur mama. I lost, I grieved, and gained with this man I call husband. He really has seen me through some of the lowest times, and the highs. He is the father of my child and my very best friend in the entire world. My existence, my life as I know it wouldn't be as bright or beautiful without him. With that being said, Happy Anniversary Woobie. You have and always will be the love of my life, and I can't wait to see what the next four years bring us...

Speaking of, as many of my Facebook friends saw, we are officially trying for baby # 2. I started to make a YouTube video to sum this up for you guys, but I kept getting really choked up about it. It was our intention to wait just a little bit longer before getting this ball rolling. We wanted to head to Vegas this March, we wanted to spend a little more time with each other and a little more time with one special little girl. This was something we've gone back and forth on for months, and I'm at a place where I know that Justin and I are ready for our second child. I'm finally ready to take on the emotions that come with fertility treatments and infertility. I no longer have this "what if" feeling in my gut when I dream of our next child. Everything feels right and my marriage and friendship with Justin is in the best place possible for this next bundle of joy.

This all happened so suddenly, so I don' want you guys to feel out of the loop. After Justin's grandfather passed, a lot of things in our household changed. We really embraced the notion of how quickly life can change in just moments. One day we were calling his grandparents home with Papoo answering and discussing the weather with me, the next he was gone. That's when the talk of Howland baby #2 started again. I started to realize that there was nothing seriously holding us back from trying. I also realized that if you have the opportunity to go after the things you want in life, why wait? My husband has been such a rock star through this entire process and I couldn't be more thankful for his patience. He's wanted another baby for quite some time and he's never really pressured me about it. He's never made me feel guilty or pushed the baby subject too heavily. I will always love him most for being such a considerate partner.

I had my first appointment yesterday with my new endocrinologist and I absolutely love her. Right from the start she let me tell her what path Justin and I were looking to take and she never made me feel uneasy about anything. We have opted to do injections again, so she prescribed provera to jump start a menstrual cycle so we can get this ball rolling. After the crimson tide shows up, I'll be taking shots to stimulate my ovaries. My doctor discussed the idea of multiples quite heavily, but I'm trying not to get overly nervous about that (yet). I am going to make a video all about my first appointment, go into more depth on the discussion, and the path we are taking. That pretty much sums up the last twenty four hours and I'm so excited to FINALLY be taking you guys on this journey with me.

How many of my readers are currently trying to conceive? How many of you are utilizing fertility treatments? Share with me in the comments below or by email.

Happy Wednesday all

♥- Leilani

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