It's happening. I am watching the bond between sisters unravel right before my eyes. Olivia just turned six month old less than two weeks ago and I am noticing the many changes that have occurred between big sister and little sister. Since the baby has become so much more mobile and curious about EVERYTHING, her and Ava are able to interact more. I've heard Ava exclaim how sissy can't play with big girl toys, she has to play with baby toys.. I've watched her snatch things out of her sister's hand (which required us to scold her a bit after doing so) and we've also watched her comfort her sister after snatching. Whenever Olivia bumps into something that results in tears, Ava is never far away. She hugs, kisses, and holds her sister as often as she can. Olivia is never still when she's enjoying floor time, so Ava always has so much fun playing with her sib. I just can't believe how quickly this relationship has grown. I mean, don't get me wrong - they are sisters and we knew this was going to happen eventually... I just feel like it came so quick for us.

Ava has to include Olivia in pretty much everything, unless it's one of her social activities or classes. She has tickle fights with her, she brings sissy ALLLL the baby toys that Olivia cannot grasp as quickly. I mean, watching these two.. it is just the most heart warming thing that you ever did see. 

♥- Leilani

Christmas

Something tragic happened a couple weekends ago that truly rattled me to my core. I am so over the destructive world that has become the reality of our lives these days. In the mists of trying to comprehend what happened, and trying to prevent myself from entering this emotional funk of grief for those who were impacted... I decided I wanted to embrace all the good, love, and happy in my own life. That meant, putting up Christmas decor and the Christmas tree SUPER early this year! To my surprise, Justin was on board, as he too wanted to feel some good that this time of year always provides for my family. Let me just say, putting up Christmas stuff while almost 31 weeks pregnant was no easy chore. My feet hurt so much more quickly then ever before, and I definitely wasn't as much help as I normally am. I haven't been pregnant for the holidays in two years, and even when I was pregnant with Ava, Justin was deployed.. so that meant I didn't do nearly as much decorating or celebrating without my love home.

Ava bug was a HUGE help this year! She was a big help last year, but I definitely think she wanted to play with ornaments and candy canes last year, where is this year, she wanted everything on the tree... sometimes even before we were ready for it. She helped unpack the Christmas boxes, she watched her daddy untangle the inevitable mess of lights, and she jammed along with the Bing Crosby pandora station we had going. This was hands down my favorite party of decorating this year. Watching my 2.5 year old just bask in the glory that is family time and celebration is always a sight to see. Side note, I am so glad that we invested in Christmas decor throughout all the years we've been married. We have a surplus amount of decor, and I think it's safe to say we won't need to pick up anything major for a good, long while.

With pregnancy brain being live, we had to redo the Christmas lights on the tree on two different occasions. I forgot to connect the correct ends one time, and I totally spaced that we had more strings of light on the other. It was tedious, but Justin was such a trooper. Putting up our special ornaments after the lights and garland is my absolute favorite. Adding Olivia's ornament just made my heart soar entirely. We have so many handmade ornaments from Justin's grandmother, and each time we add a new member to this family she sends us another blue bird ornament. I can't wait to have Livy's on the tree next year. This year was my first year with a prime lens for my camera, so I immediately tried to take a shot of that special Christmas bokeh.. I have only attempted this twice, and both times were right before bed. I did achieve the bokeh, but I'm definitely going to try and clean it up a bit the next time I give it a go.

With Thanksgiving just days away, I am definitely soaking up the holiday spirit. I can already foresee tons of hot chocolate cuddles, all warm and toasty, watching classic holiday movies until Christmas arrives! This year has got me even more ancy, as the "high" from the holidays won't wind down until after Olivia arrives. That's like having 4 MAJOR holidays in one swoop! Take a look at some of the photos I managed to get with putting up the tree this year.

♥- Leilani

Daddy's girl

While I have always encouraged Ava to favor daddy just as much as she does mommy, I never thought the saying, "daddy's girl" would ever become so literal in this house. I think this all started when I stopped nursing this past February. I was just about to start my first round of fertility meds and I was unable to nurse Ava with the meds I chose. While that was a really hard decision for me, I knew it was the best decision for our family. Three months shy of two years old and I could tell that weaning my toddler was the right thing to do for our circumstances. Surprisingly, after about a week in, we had found a new normal. Justin and I were no longer co-sleeping, Ava was no longer nursing, and all of a sudden, Justin was also called to for comfort. Let's fast forward seven months later, and here we are today.

My two year old absolutely adores her daddy. I'm sure this is the case for a lot of other two years old, but there is something extremely special about watching my kid and her dad bond together. They've developed their own relationship that has absolutely nothing to do with me. I no longer encourage Ava to let daddy help, because he's her go to. When she's upset, she calls for her daddy. When she wants "lovins" often times, she runs to her daddy first. When she comes into our room in the middle of the night because something disrupts her sleep? You got it, she goes to daddy's side of the bed first. It took me a good while to actually notice the shift that Ava made, and most days, I cry about it. It's weird not being her # 1 anymore. I wouldn't call this jealousy, but I think our new norm (& pregnancy hormones) have really caused me to be emotional about the entire situation.

At the end of the day, Justin is a terrific father, and he makes an effort to be. For that, I will always be grateful. He wakes up before the sun five days a week, and at times comes home just before sunset. Tired, exhausted, and just in the mood to relax.. he still does just about whatever Ava wants when he walks through that front door. Stickers, coloring, princess dress up, or tea party fun, you name it, he does it! I have never heard him tell his daughter no because he just didn't feel like it, even when i notice the sleep in his eyes. In the morning when he comes home from P.T. Ava leaps into his arms and gives him the biggest bear hugs! I truly think this is what jump starts his day. I listen to our daughter sing to daddy as he's getting ready in the morning, and I watch her move her toys off of the couch so daddy can sit in his favorite spot. I gaze at them sharing a bowl of her favorite cereal and laughing and having tickle wars.

I see how happy he makes her when he's reading Ramona the brave right before she goes to sleep, or how he dances around her room ballerina style, just the way she likes. There are literally a million reasons why daddy is a favorite in this house, and I try to remind myself this isn't personal. This is my daughter realizing all the things I've always known about Justin. With his career in the Army, we are truly fortunate with all the time these two have been able to have together. He's one of the first people she sees in the morning, and the very last person she sees before closing her eyes at night. I'm learning to appreciate what we have, not envy it. While there was a time where I was her sole comfort, those days have come to an end. It's been a natural process, and I have found so much love in watching Justin gain so much more special moments with his girl.

With baby #2's impending arrival, I know this is how everything was suppose to be. While another sweet girl of ours consumes more of mommy, little Miss Ava bug will be completely content with having more one-on-one time with her daddy.

♥- Leilani

Daddy/Daughter Dates

Can I just say that I absolutely love four day weekends? Seriously. I love that Justin gets these every so often from work. I know Ava bug is a fan too. When daddy's off, it's always a good time in the Howland house. Tickles in the morning, daddy's homemade pancakes, and lots of extra playtime. This weekend Justin mentioned that he is ready to incorporate more time geared towards him and Ava. We do multiple activities as a family, so it melted my heart a little bit when he suggested that idea. He's going around calling it his daddy/daughter date days.. hence the name of this blog post. How sweet is that?

The first one will actually happen today, and I'm really excited to see how it goes. There is an unlimited amount of things they could do on a Monday afternoon. Children's museum, frozen yogurt, stroll in the park, etc. I'm really glad that while they are bonding, this mama gets a little "me" time in the process. It's definitely a win/win for everyone. I guess the point of me blogging this topic was to express my gratitude. I admire the distance Justin goes in order to bond even more with his daughter. He's so happy and eager to be more involved (if that's possible) when it comes to teaching Ava something new, or taking her out on the town. Even when it comes to baby-wearing or pushing her in the stroller.. daddy wants to be the one to do it. Being a mommy is more than a full-time gig, and I really do appreciate my husband putting just as much effort into parenting as I do.

Sometimes I'll just sit and watch these two interact. I'll hear Justin say, "Do you know you are the most beautiful Ava bug in the world?" I just smile because he's said those same words to her just about her entire life. It's little things he does with her that tug at my heart strings. I'm excited to watch this new tradition between these two unravel. I think it's important that Justin and I both foster individual bonds with our kid. I also believe that the bonding process can start at any age. Take a look at some of the moments I've captured this past week. Daddy helps with everything around here, and we are blessed to have him! How many of my readers have these type of date days in their household? Do any mama's have incorporated date dates with their littles? I'd love to hear from you in the comments below or by email.

Happy Monday all!

♥- Leilani

Still the Same

I got an email this morning from a baby program that I used throughout Ava's infancy, and I actually read the entire thing. It discussed all the milestones that toddlers will (or have already) gone through at her age. I am pleased to say that Ava bug has hit every single milestone and then some. Something I'm really excited for, is seeing how much her vocabulary takes off in these next few months. I was an early talker, and I think it'd be sweet if Ava bug was too. Either way is really fine with me, it just seems as though her development has favored her father's infancy, rather than mine.

Of all the changes we are undergoing, I am really glad that there are some things that still remain the same. Cuddling is definitely one of those things. I don't know how I would feel if our baby girl just suddenly stopped loving to snuggle with mom and dad. She has seriously been a snuggler since day one of life, and that's not something I'm ready to let go of. I know Justin doesn't want to either. He loves when Ava falls asleep on him. That's his time with his little girl, and we both cherish it so very much.

On the right, Ava is about seven months, and on the left she's just two days past one year old. I've got a ton of photos like this with these two throughout the past year. I'm really glad I've been an avid picture taker. It's been nice to flip through and compare moments like this. Sadly, I think both pictures were taken after Justin fell asleep watching some type of sports game. I guess some things really don't change! 

Well, that's all I wanted to share this morning. I hope you enjoyed the Tuesday flashback as much as I do! 

Happy Tuesday all! 

♥- Leilani

DITY move with a 6 month old, her dog, and their daddy

This was our first time moving from state to state with a child, and with an animal. I've got to say, we did pretty well. We all fit comfortably in the u-haul, and we managed to make it to Texas in great timing. There were a handful of things Justin and I did to make this trip easier, and more enjoyable for all of us.

• When we stopped, it wasn't just for gas. We actually ate, took Ava out of her seat, and let Cooper walk around to use the restroom
• We played car games. Justin taught me some of the games he learned while deployed this past year
• We took pictures of each new state we entered, which kind of made it fun looking at all the landmarks we'd never seen
• I think my most favorite thing was just talking. Uninterrupted, laughing and lovey talk. I can't remember the last time we had THAT MUCH TIME to just take our time talking. 

I only had one minor heart attack during our trip. We were cruising down some highway, and Justin muttered something about don't do it. The next thing I know, he is braking EXTREMELY HARD. I seriously almost pee'd! A little sports car ripped out in front of us, causing Justin to steer off the road, and brake hard. It was super scary, but luckily nothing else came of that. That was the only fright we had during the drive. 

Ava knocked out extremely well in the u-haul. I think she may have woke up two or three time throughout the entire trip once she was in her deep sleep. I was so shocked for that! But, it was awesome. Cooper, my poor pooch. I don't think he knew what to make of the truck. He couldn't lay next to his daddy. He kept putting his head on Justin's foot that was on the gas peddle! It was just such an awkward situation for him. When we got to Texas, the first thing we did was call the truck company to turn in the dolly. Justin did SO well with driving with our car in tow. He could only go up to 55 mph, so we were getting passed quite a bit, and it definitely interfered with our arrival time, but safety does come first. After turning in the dolly, we went straight to the Laquinta Inn.. 

Let me just say I have only had good experiences at this establishment.. The one that we booked here in Texas looked VERY suspect. In fact, when we got up to our room, it wreaked of smoke. Ten seconds later, I picked up Ava bug and we decided we weren't staying there. I called the rental agency, and they were kind enough to bump our lease up a day! Yay! (which is why we are in our house now). It's funny because the front desk manager wasn't surprised that we were already turning in our keys. He assured me we wouldn't be charged, and he was completely understanding of why we chose to leave. 

A few of the things that we did after our DITY that I wish we would have done before are

• getting the water and electric turned our prior to our move in date
• weighing the truck and car prior to arriving at our new duty station
• not packing all the towels we own

All in all, I would do a DITY again. It is such a lovely feeling knowing my stuff arrived safely, and on TIME with us. I can say packing was a pain, but that's our fault for having all the stuff we have. You really do get a pretty penny from moving yourself, and that's something we are definitely not complaining about. This full DITY move actually gave us time to bond as a family on the road. Oh! Also, thank you to all my friends and family that prayed for our safe arrival. We had a very smooth sailing trip for the most part, and I can't help but think that all of you had something to do with that ;) 

Happy Thursday all! 

 ♥- Leilani

Sunday & pregnancy discoveries

So today Miss Ava decided she was going to have a low active type day. These days always make me alarmed. I have gotten to know her patterns distinctly over the last few weeks, so when she does something that isn't normal for her, I tend to freak out a bit. (for good reason) With all the things that can occur in pregnancy I'd rather be overly cautious then not cautious enough. I think it's also the classic case of first time mom worries. So anyways, I used a doppler today because I was so freaked out. I don't know why I chose to do that when I'd been out and about and I wasn't even home. As soon as I got home for the evening I drank some apple juice, laid down in bed, and sure enough this little girl is moving just fine. It's weird but I even think I feel her heartbeat. I put my hands underneath my belly and I feel rhythmic beating, like it's Ava's heart. I haven't felt anything like that before. It was actually pretty neat. On another note my belly has undeniably gotten HUGE and hard. Growing baby ! I'm excited to see how much Ava weighs at my appointment on Tuesday. Also, I was looking back at all the things I've learned during my pregnancy and I have three that I'd like to share:

AMAZON.COM:  After discovering amazon, I will never pay full retail for anything ever again. A lot of first time parents use Babies r us, Target, etc.  Justin and I would have been one of those parents. THANK GOD for mommy friends and their word of mouth advertisement. I was able to cut our baby budget almost in half by using amazon. You've got third party sellers and really competitive prices because it is a virtual store. I used main stream stores as a reference. If I saw something I liked, I price checked it on amazon.

EDUCATE: There are so many mothers out there that LOVE to give their opinions about their pregnancy experiences, their labor experiences, or their parenting styles. Sometimes unintentionally these stories can worry first time moms. If you are unsure about anything during pregnancy or have concerns about what parenting styles will be best for you, READ READ READ, ask your OBGYN or nurse. The parenting styles Justin and I have decided on are a bit different from the mom friends I have. I was able to come to my own decisions through extensive research and feedback from my doctor. Don't fear that you are doing something wrong or that your decisions aren't justified. Just make sure that you take the time to do your homework.

BONDING: I had trouble with this a lot during my first trimester and up until I was about 20 weeks in my second trimester. I was always in fear that something was going to happen to my baby. That I would be sleeping wrong, eating incorrectly, you name it I was frantic about it. If I could do it over, I would have worried less and expressed my happiness EVEN MORE. Moms have an awesome opportunity to bond with their growing babies the entire 9 months they are in our wombs. Don't let the fear of " what if's" get the best of you during pregnancy. No matter the outcome we all have this precious miracle growing within us.

                                       

This would be my little angel, Ava Leilani. 

Photo Credit: victoriasimmonsphotography

Tremendous Tuesday

Today was the best Tuesday in the history of Tuesdays! I got some VERY exciting news today. News I am unable to share, but rest assure they are none the less amazing. I started my day off with my 30 week O.B. appointment. Ava is measuring a week ahead. Her heartbeat is so strong and she is active ! Her movements increase weekly. I love it. These next few weeks are going to be busy.

Why you ask? Because I signed up for every single class possible. I start my lactation home visits tomorrow (Super excited about that) I signed up for breastfeeding courses through the hospital where I will deliver, infant care classes, birthing classes, and group meetings with the Le Leche group of Savannah. A lot of women may find this tedious of me, but If anything, I'd like to be overly confident, prepared, and aware. 

I also attended an FRG meeting today. I have to say this was my first time going and actually feeling like it was worth my time. Very informative. For any military wife, do yourself a favor and don't let ALL the nasty rumors about the family readiness program keep you away. You can limit the amount of communication you receive and the amount of participation you are in. I can't say every single meeting is worth your time, but you can decipher that for yourself. You should be receiving a monthly email and/or phone call. Often times the emails are extensive at discussing what the FRG meeting will be about, which is nice. This evening I also received a baby gift from a friend of mine here at our military installation ! She is a wiz at gifting.

Ann purchased a diaper caddy. Love the paisley print. She filled it with a bunch of products from earth mama angel baby. If you are a new mama, currently pregnant, or have suffered a loss, give this company a look see. All organic products ! Great for baby and for you. Link provided below.

earthmamaangelbaby

Inside this caddy I also received Ava's first book. I love how nursery appropriate the book was ( considering Ava's nursery is a ballerina theme) 

I read Ava this book before bed. It felt good to just talk to her and feel her kicking away. The bonding experience even while she's in my womb has been fantastic. I rub my belly, I sing to her, I talk to her, and read to her. I can't believe this week marks 30 weeks of pregnancy completed. Still in disbelief that I have this beautiful, growing, angel inside of me.