Baby boy, how did we get here? I dreaded the days prior to this blessed milestone because this makes you exactly one half of one year old. It seems like this last month you’ve just achieved milestone after milestone and while I am so incredibly happy to watch you grow, it hurts so much. Your life has been lived at such a warp speed baby. I wish the time would just slow down. Even if only for a moment. Every second with you has been such a blessing and I thank God for your continued health, growth, and joy you bring to this family.

Clothes: We have been shopping for 12 months clothing and 18 months clothing as of late. Peanut doesn’t have his well baby until the end of the week so I’m unsure of his current weight (I’m pretty positive he’s over 20 pounds at this point). Liam has these thick, roll filled thighs and that’s what makes the sizes a little more tricky. He still fits into nine month clothing, but I can tell they are getting a bit snug. Sleepers and pajamas will soon be switched out and 6-9 month clothing will most definitely be at thing of the past come October.

Health: My Liam lamb had his second cold just a week ago. His sister inevitably brought home some strain of a cold from school a couple weeks ago and it made its way through the household. Our boy was a champ and spent maybe one to three days with a stuffy nose and lots of sneezes? That was the extent of it though. He nursed quite a bit more during his sick days and I know that mama milk likely helped my baby boy get back to good health a lot sooner.

Feeding: Liam experienced solid foods for the first time today! We gave him sweet potatoes and he didn’t seem to care for them. His facial expression were hilarious, but he took to eating from a spoon + solids a lot easier than I anticipated. Nursing has been a little weird lately because our boy is teething. He doesn’t want to nurse unless he’s actually hungry (decreased comfort nursing) and he prefers me to rub his gums or hold him tight when he’s trying to fall asleep. I don’t mind it though. He prefers different methods of soothing than his sisters did and its been a sweet change of what I’m used to around here.

Sleep: I officially jinxed myself. I’m not sure I’d say its a sleep regression but this boy has been having a difficult time going down for bed at night. Normally, Liam nurses and falls asleep no problem. Lately, he’s fighting his sleep even though he’s clearly tired. Once he’s asleep though, he sleeps through the night (which is still very much appreciated). I’ve never had a hard time getting my babies to sleep, so this is definitely giving me a run for my money. I almost put Liam in the carseat to take a drive (something we have literally never done in parenthood). I’m hoping once teething lets up, his normal sleep pattern resumes.

Milestones: This boy is SO CLOSE to rolling over from back to tummy. He turns to his side, but he doesn’t allow himself to fully turn over. Liam cut his first tooth this month as well! We can see it, we can feel it, and I can’t wait for it to break through. Aside from him having a challenging time going to bed at night, there have been no others signs of discomforts in regards to teething (hallelujah). When I put Liam down for tummy time he is moving all around. He can scoot his body to the far left or right of wherever he is and I’m impressed. Maybe he’ll be crawling soon?

Things You Like: I’ve noticed that my boy appreciates conversation a lot more than ever before. I talk to him about pretty much everything and to watch his sweet little face light up - man, its everything. He enjoys having his name called and scanning a room for your face. He loves to play peek-a-boo, suck on mama’s jewelry, and watching all the fans/mobiles turn round and round. You love some good music. To name a few of your fav jams? Dancing on my own by Calum Scott. Someone to call my lover by Janet Jackson. God’s plan by Drake. Downtown by Macklemore.

Six Months

I am a total emotional wrecking ball today. I don't know if it's because I'm experiencing the rare occasion where both of my girls are taking a nap, or the pain from my wisdom tooth literally ramming into the side of my cheek (need to make an appointment, but so not ready).. but I can't help but think about all the future milestones that will soon be coming. I think the most obvious is the fact that I'll have a ONE year old Olivia Rose AND an Ava bug that will be closer to four years of life than three. February also marks our TTC month for baby # 3... don't even get me started on the feels I have about that. I dream about this third baby like they are already here. It's crazy insane how you and your partner can just know that you are not done trying to create more loving littles into your family. I think Justin and I always knew we wanted this big tribe of kiddos, but never really imagined it would feel THIS amazing. Living is believing, complete understatement! But seriously, we've been talking about this third child so much lately. We ask Ava if she wants another sibling... her response? Baby brother! 

That would be some new territory. Territory that i would feel so blessed to explore. Oh man, here come the tears. I seriously cry an INSANE amount of tears in a day - if my tears were monetary.. I'd be a BAGILLIONAIRE. Here comes the kind of sad part of six months from now... It'll have been 11 months since my mom died. Reading that makes my heart just sort of rip open from the mends I've tried to make over the last five months. What hurts the most about losing someone you love (especially your parent) is facing the fact that they are gone, forever. The situation is permanent. Normally, i don't accept permanent in my life. You don't like the way you look? Change yourself. Change your clothes, your hair, run, walk, change it all. You don't like being out of the know? Read, surf the web, get involved. There are always solutions to avoid permanent situations that you don't want to be in. Death is not one of those situations. 

I keep fighting myself because I desperately need an end date. A date where i no longer feel so much pain. A day where I'm not predispositioned to panic attacks, irrational breakdowns, and feeling like I can't breath. When Ava yells, "Mama! I love you!" While my heart is full and I'm smiling.. I also get sad. I can't call my mom and tell her I love her anymore. The hurt is just going to be forever. There is no end date. The loss is permanent. Gah! I'm so sorry if you guys are crying right now. Don't! I think being transparent and raw helps with this process. I feel like most days I am doing better, but every now and again I'll have a really rough day. All I can do is wake up and try to process the feelings a little better than i did the day before. 

You know what I failed to mention before? Six months from now also means Justin and I will be celebrating SIX years of marriage! Crazy when you give birth to one of your babies on your anniversary your first thought is their birthday haha. I love it! I can't believe it'll be six years with my favorite guy! So much good coming our way here in these next six months. I can't wait to enjoy and live more of my life with my growing family. 

I hope everyone is enjoying their first Tuesday in August! 

♥- Leilani

Six Months!

Still can't believe I'm writing this. I always compile a list of items we love or that Ava has started using each month. Honestly, this past month has gone by so quickly. Ava has started scooting, she's started to grab anything in sight, and she sits up for at least twenty seconds without any support. Ava talks so much more now than ever before. She can distinctly say, Ma, Da and Ahh-goo. When Justin or I say her name, she looks at us and smiles.Some of the things we have started using with her would be:

A mini mobile from tiny love. Ava loves this thing! She just recently became interested in playing with it. We take it with us on the go, it's a great way to keep her distracted. 

 

This cool mist humidifier has been a god sent for us. This past month Ava got her first cold (she is actually in the mists of her second). Between boogies wipes, nasal drops, and this little baby, dealing with a sick infant has been easy. 

We also love boogie wipes. It's such a better alternative for constantly wiping Bug's nose. She doesn't get any red irritation marks, it's soft, and we prefer unscented. I always have these in the diaper bag, and they are perfect for when she is sick. 

We also started using sippy cups for juice. I love these! Ava bug is such a pro. She holds onto the handles perfectly, and she's got the sucking/lifting to drink notion in little to no time at all. I really don't see us using the bottle (ever again) with how great she is with a sippy. 

I am so emotional with all of Bug's development milestones. She's right on track, and she's a healthy baby. That's really all we could ask for. this Wednesday our Princess has her six month well baby check up! I'm so excited to see how much she weighs. 

Oh, before I forget...

Day 17- I am thankful for the home I live in. Not everyone has one, and I wish everyone did.

Day 18- I am thankful for the car I drive. It is a luxury to have an automobile. I'm thankful for it. 

♥- Leilani

It's Happening

You're probably thinking that this is in regards to the compassion reassignment.. WRONG! I'm having a very emotional mommy morning. Yesterday, we had our biweekly home visit from Christa. Christa is apart of the new parent support program that I joined before Ava was born. I can't express how much Christa has helped me, influenced me, or made me feel like I am doing everything right! The program itself is worth taking a look at, if you are located on a military installation. Any who, Ava loves Christa. Always smiling and cooing at her when she visits. Apparently, Bug is in the "stranger danger" phase. I left the room for no more than two minutes, and I heard her crying. Not fussing, but legit bottom lip out, tears flowing, I felt so bad. Christa said she scanned the room for me, and when she couldn't find me, she started crying. Because Bug spends so much time, well all her time, with her parents, we are her normal. We are her constant. Although this is normal, I can't help but feel like this is my fault. Justin doesn't have a problem with this. He likes that Ava won't willingly go in the arms of a stranger like nothing is wrong. That is a definite plus, but I'm just concerned about her initial reaction to my family, even Justin's family.

Oh, I ordered Ava's highchair yesterday. I also ordered the rest of the items I needed to make Bug's baby food at home. Can you believe her highchair is already out for delivery? Sometimes, I love amazon prime! I'm going to spend this next week getting my Princess familiar with her highchair. Familiar with her utensils, and her bowls. I'm so glad we are going to ease her into this, rather than throw it at her at one time. Due to the potential pesticides in carrots, we decided to make sweet potatoes Ava's first baby food. We are also giving her juice this month! I ordered sippy cups for her! We are not putting juice in bottles! So many milestones for Ava bug this month. I cannot believe how fast this has all gone.

During my home visit with Christa, she asked what I wanted Ava to be as she got older. A question I think about often. I told her, I wanted Ava to be kind, to be warm. To be an extrovert, an optimist, funny, caring. Intelligent to a fault, giving, considerate. I want Ava to have the best attributes from her mommy, and her daddy. It was nice, thinking about who my baby is going to become. At the close of our meeting, Christa said something to me, that made me cry long after she left. She said, "I love who you are." That statement alone made me feel amazing. You hear things like that from your family, parents, or spouse, but Christa, had no reason to say that, other than the fact that she meant it. It was so nice, and touching, to have someone that has only known me a short while, say something so wonderful.

Before I start the waterworks, be on the lookout for videos! I never usually post photos of Ava (wanting to keep her beautiful face off of public blogs) but, I'm thinking I might post a video of her first time using a sippy cup, and her first time eating sweet potatoes. It's always fun to share this stuff with my family, so I thought I'd share it with my readers as well. Before I forget, here is Day 8. I am thankful for friends. They are people we CHOOSE to be apart of our lives. They are total strangers, that someday turn into someone we trust. Someone we cherish.

Alright all, I am off for the weekend! I hope you enjoy your loved ones this weekend! Hug a Veteran! Happy Friday!

♥- Leilani